There are 4 needs that everyone has according to Stephen Covey!
It has taken me some time to grasp that not any of my needs were been met. This was because I saw myself through the eye’s of the ‘others’. My chosen identities were determined by my chosen occupation and skills learned. The self-image I had created was very much influenced by my social identity. I finally realized that my self-esteem was effected by the mismatch between myself and the group standards. The fire within was slowly burning out. The past 3 years my core identity has been challenged. Over time we develop patterns of ordering our choices, beliefs, values, goals and interests. Change may occur through our experience of dissonance. On hindsight this inconsistency between my beliefs and actions has been a period of trial & error.
In many ways I was not allowing myself meet my basic needs. According to Covey:
- Physical needs are the needs you have to live. These include needs like taking care of your health, finances, career.
- Social needs are the needs you have to love. The need to love and be loved drive your needs for good relationships with friends, family, lovers, colleagues, community.
- Mental needs are the needs you have to learn. These include the need for growth and constant, never-ending improvement.
- Spiritual needs are the needs you have to leave a legacy, by filling your life with meaning, purpose and mission.
The past weeks I’ve been busy with reigniting the fire within. You probably noticed because of the infrequency of my posts. But I’m finally becoming me (again)! My true purpose is becoming more clear. I’ve mastered another stage of growth!
Maslow's hierarchy of needs is often portrayed in the shape of a pyramid, with the largest and most fundamental levels of needs at the bottom, and the need for self-actualization at the top. While the pyramid has become the de facto way to represent the hierarchy, Maslow himself never used a pyramid to describe these levels in any of his writings on the subject. If my self-diagnosis is right, I’ve reached the ‘self-actualization’ phase.
I’ve chose to post two models, that of Covey and Maslow. I think Covey has actually described Maslow’s ‘deficiency needs’: esteem, friendship, love & belonging, security and physical needs, in the model above. What do you think?
I’m finally allowing myself to fulfil my need to leave a legacy. I’ve created the momentum / have been given the opportunity to help people in their last phase of life. Indirectly, I will be fundraising to help people beat or manage cancer. Money is always needed for improving care & research. I’m pretty sure I’ve found my niche! The acquired life-skills will finally be put to good use. But if you know me a little you know that I will continue exploring and giving meaning to my life.
PS: I would like to thank those who helped make this possible. You know who you are!